Margaret (Marge) Nykaza
June 10, 1954 – August 12, 2023
Life for a typical post–Vatican II liturgical pioneer could be challenging. Sometimes, the parish liturgy enthusiast was viewed as little more than a well-meaning ideologue who was hell bent on relocating the tabernacle, removing acoustical tiles and carpeting from the worship space, or rearranging the sanctuary furniture. Such individuals were also often frustrated by the fact that their parish’s Sunday morning assembly seemingly refused to raise the roof in song with the same gusto as their separated brethren were doing across the street with ease.
Concurrently, and probably unbeknownst to the many, post-conciliar parish liturgical and musical pioneers were very often earning degrees or being inspired in classes, and seminars, and at national conventions while studying the writings of liturgical reform prophets like Romano Guardini and Virgil Michel who preached a gospel of the unmistakable connection between Eucharist and Christian charity. One such person was Marge Nykaza, a born and bred Chicagoan who heard this good liturgical news and lived it out to the fullest.
Marge brought her love of liturgy and ritual song to the underserved of Chicago in a most original and unique way. As the daughter of Tom O’Connell, a lay Franciscan and ordained deacon, she came from good stock. Having formed a parish food bank, Tom joined forces with five other local trailblazers whose work eventually blossomed into what is today The Greater Chicago Food Depository, a city-wide food bank whose mission to end hunger in the local area has continued full steam since 1979. Marge took her father’s vision and mission of feeding the needy a step further and went on to found Harmony Hope and Healing, (HHH) in 2003. Marge was inspired to feed those in need not with bread but with song. The mission of HHH would be to “heal individuals and families through the restorative power of music” by bringing music to various safe havens for the homeless and battered women’s shelters. More information can be found at https://harmonyhopeandhealing.org/
Founding HHH was Marge’s finest hour. While other honorable organizations offered the needy the basics of food, housing, clothing, and social services, Marge was inspired to offer the simple gift of song to multiple welfare agencies, both religiously affiliated and public. She formed her virtuosic idea step by step from the ground up, raising the necessary funds, legally establishing HHH as a not-for-profit, creating a board of directors, and selling her unique idea of offering music education and forming choirs composed of vulnerable women and their children to some who were skeptical of the need or value for such a program. She hired a staff and multiple clinicians and established music programs throughout the city. The idea took years to develop but it eventually took hold. It went on to serve 800 plus individuals with over 200 classes per year at its height.
Marge took selections from the Roman Catholic liturgical music repertoire and combined them with secular songs and songs from many religious and cultural traditions, sharing the lot with young and old alike. In her later years, she worked to plant the seeds of a national association of likeminded groups by developing a network composed of other similar organizations across the USA who were offering music programs to the needy as well as the incarcerated. Never one to just “talk the talk” Marge truly “walked the walk.” She lived her life with her feet firmly planted in the church’s liturgy while using her spirit, her organizational skills, her gift of music, and her voice to offer people who live a life of continuous struggle a welcome moment of jubilant song. She eventually summed it all up in these words, “I am a joy-oligist!”
Marge’s funeral Mass was celebrated on August 17, 2024 at Chicago’s Old St. Patrick Church, where HHH’s headquarters are housed. Not long after, the Chicago Archdiocesan Southwest Pastoral Musicians Group, an association Marge helped to establish, hosted a service of remembrance and a luncheon in Marge’s honor at St. Julie Billiart Church in Tinley Park, Illinois. The service included the following prayer, which is based on the Dayenu prayer from the Hebrew Passover and was written for this occasion in her honor. This prayer, a moving testimony to Marge, offers a glimpse into the person she was and the faith-filled and selfless life she lived.
Dayenu Prayer for Marge Nykaza
The response to each statement is: It would have been enough.
V. If only Margaret Mary, a wonderful daughter, sister and friend, was born into this world. R.
V. If only Marge had studied music and took voice lessons to enhance her already sweet voice. R.
V. If only Marge had sung opera while at DePaul University and brought joy to others as a “singing telegram.” R.
V. If only Marge had been a cantor in Jewish synagogues. R.
V. If only Marge had fallen in love, married Ed Nykaza, and with him raised a family of three boys, Ed, Michael, and Keith. R.
V. If only Marge had passed along her gift of song to countless others as a voice teacher and choir director. R.
V. If only Marge had been a cantor at innumerable religious services in the Christian tradition, including over Zoom at the Church of St. Hildegarde. R.
V. If only Marge had blessed couples getting married or families burying their dead with her beautiful singing at wedding and funeral Masses. R.
V. If only Marge welcomed three beautiful daughters-in-law into the family—Kelly, Fran and Christy—and was a proud and loving grandmother to her five grandchildren—Leah, Lukas, Maggie, Grace, and Michael. R.
V. If only Marge had graced the Chicago Archdiocesan Office for Divine Worship’s Music Staff by contributing her time and talent to their work of formation and training of ministers. R.
V. If only Marge had ministered as voice instructor in ODW’s Cantor Schools. R.
V. If only Marge had taught music and religion to the young men at Brother Rice High School. R.
V. If only Marge had been the Music Director at St. Linus Parish in Oak Lawn and also worked for a time at World Library Publications. R.
V. If only Marge, along with Chris Rojek, had spearheaded the forming of the Southwest Pastoral Musicians group of Vicariate V. R.
V. If only Marge had gotten her Master’s Degree at Loyola University’s Institute of Pastoral Studies. R.
V. If only Marge had taken a final course at Loyola University titled “Ministry in the City” and did her final project in a women’s shelter. R.
V. If only Marge founded Harmony, Hope & Healing, a not-for-profit that provides a safe environment for the vulnerable and underserved to heal and rebuild through the restorative power of music, with Old St. Patrick’s Church as their home base. R.
V. If only Marge had traveled to countries such as Kenya in Africa and parts of Ireland, Italy and New Zealand to share her gift of song and the message of Harmony, Hope and Healing. R.
V. If only Marge had studied chant, been certified as a Cross-Cultural Music Healing Practitioner, and gotten her Doctoral Degree from the Graduate Theological Foundation. R.
V. If only Marge manifested strength, courage and a tremendous faith in God midst joys and trials throughout her life and especially during her long illness with cancer. R.
Tribute prepared by Michael A. Cymbala.
Dayenu Prayer written by Denise LaGiglia. Used with permission.
Copyright © 2024 by Michael A. Cymbala
All Rights Reserved. Used with permission.